My Letter to Mary


Mary, when I consider women worth striving to emulate, your name comes to mind. Not because I would have wanted your life, but because you knew how to live yours.

What you understood as early as your teenage years I have yet to fully grasp. And I believe I’m getting it now. I think I know where my problem lies.

I’m holding on too tight when I should be letting go.

That’s what it is, isn’t it.

I picture you on your journey with the man you’re hoping to grow old with. Full term. Uncomfortable on every platform imaginable and I wonder:

  • Did the conversation flow smoothly between you and Joseph?
  • Were you contracting on and off?
  • Did you have any idea what to expect with your marriage, your future, your immediate family?
  • Did you feel ready to meet this miracle of a baby?
  • Were you able to talk openly with Joseph about your fears? About your pain? Or did you try to hide as much as possible?
  • Did you comfort him when he presumably felt like an utter failure for not being able to provide better accommodations?
  • How did you handle the smell while breathing deep?
  • Did you feel alone? Or was living in His will enough?

My mind can’t help but sing the all familiar “Mary Did You Know” song when I contemplate talking with you. But that song is sorely lacking. Because I don’t want a yes or no answer. What I really want to know is:

How did you handle what you didn’t know?

These are things I plan on asking you when the opportunity arises. Even while typing those words I realize how silly that would be.

I’m doing it again, aren’t I. Getting caught up–holding on too tight to the details when I should be letting go.

Tell me, Mary, does it get easier with practice?

Of all the capable women, of all the more suitable prospects, God picked you to carry the greatest treasure this world will ever know. He chose you. Mary, how does that feel? Was it your humbleness that made it possible to say “yes” to the proposition?

I’m picturing you sitting across from me, sipping your chai latte, chuckling at my naive-ness. Because, yes, I can hear You, Lord.

You picked me, too…didn’t You, Father.

He asks the question to every believer:
Will you love Me with all that you’ve got?

And I realize, I am the one who has everything to gain by saying ‘yes’ as He’s already shown He’d give it all up for me.

Mary, thank you.

Thank you for paving the way for girls like me to see anything is possible to those who love Him.

Thank you for showing me life is way more adventurous while living out His will.

Thank you for bearing the pain, the ring of fire, so that I might be saved.

Thank you for saying yes. No matter the cost.

If you can do it, so can I. I can give Him control…I can live a life of worship. By your example.

And Mary said:
‘My soul glorifies the Lord and
my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
for He has been mindful of the

humble state of His servant…
for the Mighty One has done great things for me
Holy is His Name.
Luke 1:46-49

How about you, friend? Can you let it all go and give your whole self to Him? Like Mary? I’d love to hear.

Thanks for sharing your time with me.

Simply striving,


29 thoughts on “My Letter to Mary

  1. I love pausing to think about Mary and what it would have been like for her…what she would have been thinking…how she would have released all her fears to the Lord.
    Thank you for the focus on her faith-filled words of trust. Love this Nikki…

    • Since becoming a mother, I can’t stop thinking about her some days, Kara! Some days I like to wonder how she handled his mischievousness in his elementary years…did she ever doubt He was who God said He was going to be?

      I pray I never doubt who God says my son will be, either…

  2. Hi Nikki
    This is just awesome. I sometimes forget that Mary and Joseph were only people just like us. Your post really touched my heart in a deep way.
    Hugs XX

  3. Nikki, I smiled big when I saw the title of your post in my inbox. Maybe this is the weirdest comment ever, but: It touches me deep when someone has an appreciation/admiration/love for Mary. See, as a Catholic I am so blessed with resources to study Mary. Many people mistakenly believe that we Catholics worship her. Of course, we only worship God, but, for reasons you state here, she’s a pretty special woman. One to emulate. I see her fiat in you;) Xoxo

  4. It is amazing to contemplate what life might have been like for Mary…her humility and trust get me every time…oh for the grace and courage to be like her…Thank you for pointing to Him…Your heart for Him always touches me, my friend…hugs to you 🙂 Praying you are feeling better.

    • Love when our journeys collide, Dolly. Your post on Mary on Monday… I must admit, I wrote this post over a year ago and never got around to posting it until you prompted me to do so! So thank YOU… Love and hugs to you, friend. Trust Bailey is a fast learner : )

  5. Beautiful words, my friend!

    A couple of years ago I was studying women in the bible and while I studied Mary my eyes were opened when I read, “I am the Lord’s servant. May it be to me as you have said.” and, after years of reading this, I finally got it! WOW! Mary was so filled with faith!

    “I am yours, God. Use me. Any way that you see fit, Lord.” are not easy words out my mouth. I hold tight, unwilling to let go of controlling my life…even after God has proven over and over….and over and over…again that He is SO trustworthy. He has plans for me. Plans to prosper and not harm me! He is worthy of all my praise, my devotion and my trust!

    Oh to be a little more Mary so that I could become a little more like Jesus!

  6. I too have been so curious about Mary lately. The Bible doesn’t tell too many details of her. It leaves a lot to prayer and the imagination. I hope to give Him my all every day. ~ Love out girl, Amy

    • That is my hope, too, Amy.
      Mary sure knew how to worship with her whole heart, soul, and mind. If I gave God that much, just think what He could do through me!! I already see what He does through you ; ) Love and hugs to you! ~Nikki

  7. Beautiful pause and reflection…and some introspection.;) I love Mary and her amazing heart. I love contemplating how in the world she dealt with it all and then each time seeing how our heavenly Father lovingly guided her each step. (And that He does the same for me) I needed this today.Thank you Nikki!

  8. I so adore you… your heart for Him and for hearing fresh and leaning in and standing tall and loving wild… (and sipping Hot Nutella – which, btw, I bought the BIG jar!) I love the song, “Mary Did You Know” but when I find myself pondering things about Mary – I often reread Max Lucado’s words from God Came Near – both Mary’s Prayer – and his 25 Questions for Mary. So rich!

  9. What an incredibly beautiful post! Mary is such an amazing example for us of complete and utter trust and obedience. Jesus loved her so and it is easy to see why. I love Mary, as well, and try my best to emulate her selfless love for her family in everything she did. I fail miserably, but I keep trying! 🙂

    • Love that you keep trying, Lisa! Sometimes I wonder if that’s really all He asks of us…to keep seeking His face.
      So nice to see you today, friend. Thanks for sharing with me! I’ll be by your place soon!

  10. It is hard to imagine sitting across from Mary and just talking girl talk. I wonder if she had fears and tears. Is it possible for any one to give all they’ve got all the time? Such a beautiful and humble faith! Did it grow stronger each year as she stayed close to the presence of God? Perhaps faith is simply a gift from God for each of us that loves Him with a heart that seeks Him continually.
    Thanks Nikki for your beautiful thoughts on Mary. May we all grow in grace as we hope and pray to have a faith like hers.

  11. We watched the Nativity Story on sunday night. I love that movie! How real it shows what probably happened. How stunned and disappointed Joseph must have felt. How confident Mary must have felt, yet with just a hint of fear. how on their journey to Bethlehem they would have been both weary. discussing how they’d know HE was more than just a child.
    I doubt i’d have been so brave.
    love u dear!

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