- I’d rather spend my time reading a great book than watching one transposed into a 3 hr movie, but that’s just me.
- Cooking at home for my family brings me more joy than having a stranger serve all of us at a restaurant, but that’s just me.
Do you ever say “that’s just me” or is that just me? I don’t like saying it as it feels like I’m apologizing for who I am or worse yet, judging you for not being the same. It insinuates not offending you is more important than revealing the real me. Maybe it’s the ‘but’ that implies all that. Regardless, I try not to say it, or if I do own it proudly.
Yes, I’m just me.
A Child of Christ.
A granddaughter, daughter, aunt, niece, cousin, sister, wife, in-law, mom, friend.
That’s just me:
Redeemed. Blessed. Loved. Accepted.
I grew up in small town northern Minnesota. I was the 2nd child of 4 — the first girl. When I was nearly 4, my parents committed their lives to Christ while on the brink of divorce. This decision to accept His will instead of their own while upholding their marriage vows impacted my life greatly. Although I was young, I have never forgotten the gift I was given of witnessing the power of grace firsthand. I asked Christ into my heart shortly after and enjoyed starting this new journey as a family.
Church played a major role in my childhood and am so blessed because of it. We went on Wednesday nights and on Sundays twice. I participated in as many youth events as I could. This church body was like family to me and I enjoyed participating. Belonging.
This desire to belong took me for a few wrong turns along the way and eventually morphed into a desire to be accepted. To fit in. I wasn’t a perfect child. To say I was a strong-willed teenager would be an understatement. I was determined to get my way when I saw no harm in it. Looking back, I can see it is merely by the grace of God I am where I am today.
The summer following my senior year of high school became a turning point for me.
It all started with a conversation I had with a very dear friend. He was looking for the truth to some thought-provoking meaning-of-life questions and I felt I had the answers – they were ingrained in me from church. I was so proud of my witnessing moment. His response put me in my place. He said something along the lines of “Nikki, why are you so ashamed to show what you believe? Why am I just hearing about who you really are now? You should own it proudly – it suits you. Don’t ever be ashamed for being what you believe to be true. I’m not sure we believe the same thing, but I love you more now that I know what you’re made of. Don’t try to be like anyone else. Stand out and be proud to be unique. For you are. You are one in a million.”
He was right. I didn’t want to believe it, but the truth was I did hide my faith when it was convenient. This conversation forced me to challenge my beliefs and ultimately caused me to get off the fence of blending in. I spent a lot of time that summer in The Word and in prayer. Searching for guidance, adjusting my focus, praying for refinement. Long story short, I ultimately realized being accepted by The One that matters most was more important than everyone liking me. I made a commitment then to live for Christ like I meant it. God spoke to me through that true friend, and I will be forever grateful.
I married my college sweetheart soon after graduation and my life has never been the same.
Together, we have experienced new environments, roles, joys, and God’s unfailing love.
We have endured trials, pain, sickness, loss, stress and have become stronger because of it by the grace of God.
My life isn’t anything near what I had expected it to be. It’s way better. I am rich in grace, abundant in love, blessed beyond belief. For I am living His will. I am walking in faith. And I am encouraged daily that
“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is they faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, says my soul, therefore I will hope in Him.” (Lamentations 3:22-24 NRSV)
Yes. That’s just me.
To God be the glory.
What makes you just you? I’d love to hear. . .
Thanks for sharing your time with me.